Getting Older?

Since a young age, I’ve always dreamed of being in my 60’s. I pictured myself sitting in an antique armchair in my cottage, sharing the adventures of my life to my grandchildren. They would look at me with their big eyes, and cute little mouths open wide in awe, completely captured in the stories of what grandma has done when she was young. Funny thing is, I panicked when I turned 28. It felt like the end of the world because that meant I only had one more year in my 20’s. Somehow, 30 came along peacefully and I’ve been feeling more energetic and goal-oriented ever since then. After getting past what most people think one should do or achieve in their 30’s, I feel more confident and experienced in how to live a fuller life. The image of already being an elderly still comes to me from time to time, and I can’t wait to meet the future me. One reason that I am fond of aging is the experience I’ll already have gained, and presumably the more matured mind that would come along. It calms my mind when there is less “wondering” and more been-there-done-that. As far as I can remember, I’ve always been impatient to get to the finish line of everything.

In the past few years, I started noticing myself growing older mentally as I gradually developed interests in activities I thought I would never do while at a younger age. For example, cooking, gardening and working from home. Cooking has never been my forte nor hobby. And I self-proclaim as a spontaneous cook. Most of the time, I dump whatever I can find in the kitchen to the pot to make a meal. Whatever my ginny pigs said, I deemed reading the recipe as an act of killing my creativity. Lately though, I began having thoughts about following instructions and learning how to properly cook a meal. If time travel existed, and my 20-year-old self were to find out how much I’ve changed in 10 years, she would most likely destroy me on the spot.

Are these inner changes simply a normal process of life, or a sign of getting older? The concept of aging used to scare me, but now I love having treaded more steps in the journey of life. And I can’t wait to see what lies ahead.

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